Beltane

May Eve and May Day or Beltane is one of the four fire festivals in the wheel of the year.  It is a celebration of the sexual union between the Lord and the Lady and is the point where the Lady becomes pregnant with the Lord and he will be reborn at Yule.  The May Pole is the most prevalent symbol of Beltane, but there are other ways to celebrate the coming together of the Goddess and the God.  Even though I'm not a technically a solitary, building a Maypole at my parent's house is not exactly feasible, so I needed a few alternatives.  So, I opened up my copy of Scott Cunningham's Wicca: A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner and found a much more do-able ceremony for Beltane.

If you do not own Cunningham's Guide for Solitary Practitioner, I strongly recommend getting a copy.  It was one of the first three books I purchased when I started my "official" path last summer.  Of all the rituals I've read for Beltane, his is my favorite.  He recommends celebrating in a forest or near a living tree and then cast your circle.  The rest of the ritual is posted below:
Create a small token or charm in honor of the wedding of the Goddess and the God to hang upon the tree.  You can make several if you desire.  These tokens can be bags filled with fragrant flowers, strongs of beads, carvings, flower garlands - whatever your talens and imagination can conjure.  Arrange the altar, light the candles and censer and cast your circle. 
Then, say the following blessing:

May the powers of The One,
the source of all creation;
all-pervasive, omnipoten, eternal;
may the Goddess,
the Lady of the Moon;
and the God,
Horned Hunter of the Sun;
may the power of the Spirits of the Stones,
rulers of the elemental realms;
may the powers of the stars above and the Earth below,
bless this place, and this time, and I who am with You.

Invoke the Goddess and the God:

Gracious Goddess,
You who are the Queen of the Gods,
the lamp of night,
the creator of all that is wild and free;
Mother of woman and man;
lover of the Horned God and protectress of all.
Descend, I pray,
with Your Lunar ray of power
upon my circle here!


Blazing God,
You Who are the King of the Gods
Lord of the Sun,
master of all that is wild and free;
Father of woman and man,
Lover of the Moon Goddess and protector of all.
Descend, I pray,
with Your Solar ray of power
upon my circle here!

Stand before the altar and say, with wand (or hands) raised:

O Mother Goddess, Queen of the night and of the Earth;
O Father God, King of the day and of the forests,
I celebrate Your union as nature rejoices in a ritous
blaze of color and life.  Accept my gift, Mother Goddess
and Father God, in honor of Your union.

Place the token(s) on the tree.

From Your mating shall spring forth life anew;
a profusion of living creatures shall cover the lands,
and the winds will blow pure and sweet.
O Ancient Ones, I celebrate with You!

Enjoy Cakes and Wine and close the Circle.

Blessed Beltane Everyone!

My Altar

I couldn't really think of anything to post today, so I thought I'd post a picture of my spring altar.

Happy Thursday everyone!  It's beautiful outside on the East Coast, so go out and play!

Storm Moon Recap

Last night was our first coven meeting.  It was only four of us to start as some of the members are away for spring break, but it was wonderful.  Our ritual was very similar to what The Domestic Witch posted on her blog yesterday, so you can take a peek over at her blog for the ritual specifics.  It would be a bit redundant for me to post them a second time here.

We didn't get to see the moon herself last night, but the name of this March moon was quite appropriate as it is still storming here in New York.  There was a break in the storm, so we were able to go out into my friend's yard and spread our offerings to the Goddess and the creatures of spring.  In the distance I was able to catch the glipse of some spring rabbits running around.  It was quite fitting for the end of our first coven ritual. 

Something that all of us plan to grow and change along with our blessed seeds is in our health.  We all want to look better and feel better about ourselves which is why I cannot thank The Domestic Witch enough for her spring cleaning event.  It is really helping me keep focused on my overall goal for spiritual and physical cleansing.  We also all commented on how creating this coven is something we've all planned or hoped to do for a long time, but were not independent enough, from our parents and in our own selves, to actually do it.  I really think it will help bring our friendships closer together and really help us draw a great bit of power and energy into our projects. 

I hope everyone had an amazing full moon last night!  Blessed be.

Ostara Blessings

We are very blessed here on the East coast.  It will reach 70 degrees here again today and it is perfect Ostara celebration weather!  I am feeling crafty today, so besides the normal ritual celebration of the Sabbat, I will be making something for Ostara this year.  I have taken my craft from The Way of the Green Witch by Ann Murphy-Hiscock.  Although there are some errors and misinformation about Green Witchcraft in her book, I tend to look past that and take the useful information (which there is a great deal of).

So, besides coloring some Ostara Eggs tonight, here is another crafty project that you may want to tackle!  It is pretty involved, but I think it is a cute fun project, especially if you are starting your garden this weekend.

Garden Stepping Stone

You will need:

• Newspaper
• Aluminum Foil Pie Plate (at least 2" deep)
• Small bag of concrete mix (quick setting or a special stepping stone blend)
• Water
• Measuring Cup 
• 1 foot x 1 foot piece of screening
• Rubber Gloves
• Bucket
• Paint stirrer
• Obsidian stones (Michael's and AC Moore have beads made from natural stones - and they are 40% off this weekend!)
• One Tbsp. each of three protective herbs (try angelica, rosemary and cloves)
• Optional Old Serving Spoon
• Optional Twig or Popsicle stick
• Optional Acrylic paints and brushes
• Optional Clear Varnish (spray is the easiest) 

 How to Make

1. Spread the newspaper over your work surface.
2. Cut the screening to fir inside your pie plate.  This will reinforce your stepping stone once it is dry.  Put aside.
3. Blend your herbs together using your mortar and pestle.  Set them aside.
4. Pour the concrete powder into your bucket.  Add the water.  Using the paint stirrer, mix them together.  Follow the directions on your bag of concrete for how much water to the concrete (it's usually 5 part concrete to one part water).  The mixture should be thick and wet, but not splashy; more like drop-cookie dough than cake batter.  Do not use the entire bag.  Only use enough to fill the pie plate (a small bit extra to be safe is fine).
5. Pour or spoon the concrete mix into the aluminum pan.  Fill until it is half-full.  Tap the mold to release air bubbles and use the paint stirrer to smooth out the concrete.
6. Lay the screening on top of the concrete in the mold.  Pour more concrete on top of the screening, filling the mold approx. 2/3 full.  Tap the mold again to release air bubbles.
7. Sprinkle the herbs on the top of the concrete.  Remember to visualize their protective energy while placing them.
8. Pour more concrete on top of the herbs.  This time you will fill the mold completely.  Tap the mold again to release any remaining air bubbles.  (3 is also a magically number)
9. Leave the mold for about an hour.  This will allow it to set slightly and give a firm surface to place the stones.
10. After the hour has passed, place the obsidian stones into the mold.  Make any shape you'd like.  A starburst shape in the middle of the stone is a good shape for the repelling of negative energy or using them for the points on a 5 pointed star is another good shape.  You can trace the star with a stick with the popsicle stick/twig.
11. Now, set the mold aside for 2-3 days to fully dry.  You may want to leave it a little longer to ensure the mold won't crumble.
12. Once the mold has fully dried, pop the stone out of the mold onto the newspaper.  Gently loosen the sides and peel the aluminum pie plate away from the stone.  Turn the stone over so that the obsidian is on top.
13. If you'd like you can paint the stone with acrylic paints.  Once the paint is dry, coat the stone with a clear varnish to protect it from the elements.  Then, you can place the stone in your garden!

I'm going to try to make this today.  When my stone is completed, I'll post the finished product.

Ostara Blessings everyone!

Spring Cleaning: Phase One

Spring Cleaning with The Domestic Witch starts this Sunday.  I'm actually starting a little bit early, but I am following her schedule:

Week ~ Area of the Home ~ Area of Life
Week 1 ~ Home Exterior and Repairs ~ Health and Fitness
Week 2 ~ Front Porch/Entryway ~ Personality and Self-image
Week 3 ~ Kitchen and Dining Room ~ The Heart of Your Life
Week 4 ~ Living Areas ~ Entertainment and Social Life
Week 5 ~ Your Bedroom ~ Love Life and Relaxation
Week 6 ~ Kids' Bedrooms ~ Fertility and Parenting
Week 7 ~ Bathroom ~ Beauty and Hygiene
Week 8 ~ Home Office/Den ~ Career and Finances
Week 9 ~ Back Yard ~ Connecting with Nature
Week 10 ~ Front Yard ~ Living Green
Week 11 ~ Garage/Attic/Basement ~ Emotional and Mental Clutter
Week 12 ~ Laundry Area and Closets ~Your Shadow Self

I don't own my own home yet, but I will be helping my mother clean hers.  Since The Domestic Witch's first Week is focused on personal health and fitness, I started by eliminating all harmful cleaners and beauty products.  I've been replacing them with plant based, green products and  I wanted to recommend one of them to all of you out there in blog land.  The company is called Onesta and they make all natural hair products.  The best part is that they are vegan (no animal products used) and cruelty free (no animal testing).  Everything in them is plant based.   It's not available for purchase except in salons, so I'm not sure how easily any of you can get it where you live, but their line of hair products, especially the shampoo and conditioner, are wonderful.  Check out their website and see if a salon near you sells their line of product.  Any pagan would appreciate their pledge for green living as well as their contributions towards cancer research.

Ostara Prayers

stara Prayers

I've been getting Ostara lessons for the past few days from About.com and I felt a strong attachment to three of the prayers sent to me today.  I thought I'd share them with you for Thursday's blog.  First is a Garden Blessing, so for all of you starting gardens and planting seeds, this is something you may want to say while you plant.

The earth is cool and dark,
and far below, new life begins.
May the soil be blessed with fertility and abundance,
with rains of life-giving water,
with the heat of the sun,
with the energy of the raw earth.
May the soil be blessed
as the womb of the land becomes full and fruitful
to bring forth the garden anew.

There is also a prayer for the Goddesses of Spring that I liked.  I don't worship all of the Goddesses mentioned in this particular version, but I'm sure you can insert Goddesses that you have an attachment to.

Hail, and welcome!
Green life returns to the earth
blooming and blossoming
once more from the soil.
We welcome you,
goddesses of spring,
Eostre, Persephone, Flora, Cybele,
in the trees,
in the soil,
in the flowers,
in the rains,
and we are grateful
for your presence.
 

And lastly, this prayer will be helpful, especially if any of you still have snow on the ground.  This prayer is for the resurrection or waking up of the Earth.

The death sleep of winter has slowly faded,
the rigor of the ground loosens,
and the earth is once more reborn.
Like Mithras and Osiris,
reborn from death,
life returns again to the land,
springing up as the snow melts away.
As the soil warms and the days grow longer,
dew forms along new sprouts of grass,
bringing life back.
Awaken! Awaken! Awaken!
And rise!
Let the earth come to life again,
and welcome the light of spring!

Ostara Altar Ideas

stara

I thought my first Ostara post should be about altar ideas.  Whenever I set up my altar, I take my inspiration from the season itself, then I add the traditional symbols of the holiday.

Altar Cloth Colors
Everyone always typically picks pastel colors for spring.  Personally, I cannot stand pastels.  The closest I get to using a pastel is using a pale green for my Ostara altar cloth.  However, draw your own color ideas from what you see outside.  Another color I tend to use is violet because it is the color of the tulips outside of my house and they are the first flowers I see in spring.  You can do the same at your house.  Don't remember which color flowers come up first?  Then go with whatever color feels right to you.

Flowers
I also tend to decorate my altar with plants and/or flowers which reflect the season.  Tulips and Daffodils are early spring flowers and I will often use them in my set up.  Plus, if you'd like to get really symbolic, they both look like phallic symbols (tulips representing female; daffodils representing male). 

Spring Symbols
Growing up a Catholic, there were always egg and bunny decorations all over my house.  They are still there since I still live with my parents (I'm married too - imagine how much fun that is!). Interestingly enough, none of the decorations my mother has put up this year say "Happy Easter," but say "Happy Spring" instead.  Now to your altar.  Because this time of year was always rabbits and eggs, I continue the same theme on my altar.  The Christmas Tree Shoppe has tons of cheap, cute holiday decorations.  I highly recommend taking a stop in there if you have a store near you.  You can also make many of your own decorations.  I still color hard boiled eggs and place them on the altar.  I'm still working on Earth friendly, home-made dyes.  If they don't work out, food coloring and vinegar still works.  After my ritual, I put them back in the fridge for breakfast the next morning.  

                   Other Home-made Altar Ideas: These are all great, especially if you have little ones.

• Home-made butterflys or caterpillars
• Lambs
• Mosaics - great as a hot plate for your cauldron! 
• Stained Glass projects - AC Moore and Michael's have these or try this link to make one from melted crayons!
• Birdhouses
• Nests with eggs
• Tissue Paper flowers

Other Items You May Want to Include:
Honey and Milk are also spring symbols and you may want to include a glass of one or both on your altar.  Milk is obviously a symbol of fertility and motherhood.  You can pour the glass of milk outside as a gift (much like an Imbolc ritual) or offering to the Lord and the Lady or to the Fae.  Honey is a symbol of abundance.  Spring is a time that is abundant with life both physically and metaphorically.  The honey can be used later in cakes and wine or as part of an Ostara dinner or even in a nice cup of herbal tea.

I hope everyone enjoys these ideas!

March New Moon Ritual

I have been very busy with my Graduate school work this weekend.  Because I've been such a busy bee, I haven't had the chance to post my promised rituals for Ostara and the New Moon!  I'm a very bad blogger. 

Tonight is the March New Moon.  New Moons are a representation of the Goddess in the form of the Crone.  It is also symbolic of new beginnings, rebirth, and death.  The March New Moon can be seen as the death of winter and the birth of spring.  All around us we can see the signs of the coming warmth.  This morning I saw my first robin.  He was jumping around the raindrops in my backyard.  I couldn't help but watch and giggle.  Thank goodness neither of my kitties were outside!

I've often found that New Moons are the best time for meditation.  Full Moons rituals can be more elaborate as each has a name and purpose within the Wheel of the Year.  New Moons are separate in my practice.  I still conduct a small ritual, but the main purpose of the New Moon is to meditate and reflect on the self.  I seem to be doing a lot of reflecting lately and I think it is because I have so much stress in my life.  So, if you feel the same, I hope this short New Moon ritual is helpful for you.

You Will Need:
A Bowl of Water (Water)
A Bowl of Salt or Dirt (Earth)
A Feather or your favorite insense (Air)
A Yellow or Red Candle (Fire)

Arrange the items listed above as you see fit.  Everyone has their own preference for altar set-ups.  If you wish to have a traditional altar, feel free.

Ritual (This is my personal meditation.  Feel free to change it for your own needs/beliefs):

1. Light the red/yellow candle and incense (if using).  I usually arrange the objects around me in a circle and  I lay down.  I'd like to conduct this ritual outside, but it's always raining!

2. Raise your open arms and say "As [your name for the Goddess] are you known to me, for this is Moon of my Lady as the Crone, Lady of Darkness, of Wisdom, of Mysteries revealed.  The Wheel turns through birth, death, and rebirth, and every end is a new beginning.  You are the Passage from life to life; You are She who is at the beginning and the end of all time.  You, with Your Lord [your name for the God] at your side, abide in us all, so mote it be!" - from the Grimoire for the Green Witch by Ann Moura

3. Close your eyes and begin to meditate: While sitting or standing or laying down, cross your arms.  Imagine yourself walking in the woods toward your sacred space.  Concentrate on the feeling of the ground beneath you.  Focus on the cool feeling of the soil beneath your feet.  Feel empowered by the crunching of twigs and leaves as you walk.  As you walk, you notice a clearing in the trees.  There, in the clearing, you see an old woman.   She stands there, motionless.  However, a voice tells you to approach her.  There is nothing surrounding her except the trees.  They are leafless, but you notice the buds beginning to appear on the branches.  There is an immediate warmth surrounding the elderly woman.  Again, you hear a voice inviting you to take her hand and sit.  Together, you sit in the middle of the clearing, holding first one hand and then both.  Finally, she speaks, but only one word, "Listen."  You close your eyes, and focus on the sounds reverberating around you.  They are the sounds of spring: the robin, the scampering of small animals on leaves, water dripping from tree branches.  You open your eyes.  The old woman speaks again: "Listen, closer."  You begin to focus beyond the forest around you and you hear the Earth awakening.  You heart her heart beating and you feel it beneath you.  You begin to realize that your heart and the Earth's are beating together.  Feel yourself coming back to life with her.  Think of your mind, body and spirit opening up like a new spring flower.  You are reborn again.  Again, you open your eyes.  The old woman is now standing before you.  She speaks for the last time: "Rise."  As you stand before her, she takes your hand again and smiles.  That same warmth you felt when you first approached fills you again and you begin your walk back through the path.  Even though she is behind you, the Goddess is still walking beside you, holding your hand.


4. Slowly open your eyes.  You may still feel that warmth gaining in the meditation.  You may feel very emotional, especially if this is the first time you've seen the Goddess, in any form.  You may need a few moments with yourself alone.  Once you are ready, raise your open arms again and say: "You are the Dark Mother of All; the Tomb that is also the Womb.  You are at the beginning and end of life.  You dwell within us all for You are Life, the Passage to New Life, and Love; and thus do You make me immortal through in the cycle of Life, the Passage to New Life, and Love.  Love is the Law and Love is the Bond! So mote it Be! - from the Grimoire for the Green Witch by Ann Moura

5. Blow out the candle if you wish to end the ritual.  If not, you may wish to have cakes and wine.

I  also enjoyed the March New Moon ritual on A Pagan Tapestry. You may want also want to bookmark her blog.  I've put many of her posts into my Book of Shadows.

After all the waiting . . .

spring has finally arrived.  I'm a little sad to see the snow melting, but a smile comes to my face when I spot tulips poking through the soil.

It has me thinking about my first Ostara celebration next week.  Even though I've had a Pagan/Wiccan mindset for most of my life, it will be my first ritual.  I plan on finding the nerve to meet with the coven I found on meetup, because I don't want to spend another holiday alone.  Living at home with my parents, who I have not "come out of the broom closet" to, performing a ritual the exact way that I want to is a bit difficult.  The last few holidays I celebrated with a friend or I had to wait until the house was empty to do anything.  I know that ritual isn't everything, but it does make me feel better inside.  I feel closer to the Lord and Lady when I do them, so I'm really looking forward to next Saturday.

I plan on posting different Ostara items in the next few days.  Look for different spells, meditations, and ways to bring the holiday and the gods into the mundane portions of your life.

My Witchy Self

I've seen this on a few of the other blogs I follow, so I thought that since this is a newer blog, it may be a good idea to share my answers.

Do you have a magical name?
I know it may seem clichè, but I use Willow as my Craft Name.  I have another name, but it is personal between myself and the Lord and Lady. 

Does it have a special meaning?
I didn't take it from the character on Buffy or the film.   Before conducting my initiation ceremony, I meditated about a name for myself.  I wanted the Lord and the Lady to help me so I found a quiet place in my friend's backyard (which is where I performed the ceremony), laid in the grass, closed my eyes and meditated.  A vision of myself under a willow tree appeared while I meditated, but it would often morph and I would be the tree itself.  It's difficult to fully explain what I experienced, but the name came from that vision.

How did you find Wicca/Paganism?
Two friends of mine are openly Wiccan and I eventually was brave enough to ask them questions about their path.  They both shared books and brought me to pagan friendly shops.  I also searched online before speaking to them and bought a few books of my own.  Reading them first guided me towards the questions I wanted to ask.

How long have you been practicing?
About a year officially, but I've been of the "Wiccan mindset" for years.

Solitary or group practitioner?
Currently I'm a solitary but I have plans to meet with a Wiccan group later this month.

What is your path?
I follow a Green Path of Wicca, but I do have elements of other paths that I mix in based on personal beliefs.

Are you out of the broom closet?
Yes and No.  There are some people that I work with that know about my practice and all of my friends know.  However, my family (mom, dad, grandparents, aunts/uncles) do not know.

Gods/Goddess

Who are your patron Gods?
Cernunnus

Who are your patron Goddesses? 
Brigid.

Which Gods/Goddess' do you worship?
I tend to stay within the Celtic pantheon. 

Do you fear dark aspects of the Gods/Goddess, or rather, respect them?
No.  I respect them.  You cannot have dark without light.

Do you worship the Christian God?
I do not worship, but I have no issue with people who choose to follow that path.

Do you ever worship animals?
No, but I do respect their part in the balance.

Or plants?
See above.


Nature

Do you regularly commune with nature?
Daily.

Ever walked barefoot in the woods?
Yes, but it's a bit cold to do right now.  When it warms up, I'll be doing it again.

Taken a camping trip just to talk to nature?
Not yet, but the hubby and I plan to go this summer.

Describe the moment you felt closest to Mother Earth?
When I'm snowboarding.  The quiet that you hear on top of the mountain, especially when Nature is sleeping under the snow, is incredible.  Also when I'm hiking in the woods.  I'll stop and often just sit listening to the sounds she makes around me.

What is/are your power animal(s)?
Not sure yet.

Do you have a familiar?
Yup.  Frankie the cat.

Have you ever called upon the powers of an animal in ritual?
No.

Or a plant?
No.

Do you hug trees?
All the time.

Give them gifts?
I will often leave gifts for the fae at the foot of plants and trees and I'll leave little things for the trees.

What is your favorite flower to work with?
Gardenias.

What is your favorite tree to work with?
Willow. :)

Wheel of the Year

What are your favorite holidays?
Samhain and Beltane.

What if your least favorite holiday?
I don't really have a least favorite.

Have you ever held a ritual on a holiday?
Yup yup.

Ever taken a day off work to celebrate a pagan holiday?
They tend to work well with the school calendar, so I don't need to.

Do you celebrate Yule on the 21 rather than the 25?
I celebrate Christmas with my family on the 25th, so I have my own rituals on the 21st.

Have you ever felt the Veil thin?
Yes.

Ever danced the Maypole?
This year will be my first.

Know what the Maypole symbolizes?
Yes and I do giggle about it sometimes.

Ever made love on Beltane?
Hehehehe.

How do you usually celebrate the pagan holidays?
Depends on my needs at that particular point.

Divination

Do you use Tarot?
All the time.  It is the first form of divination I ever used as a child and I feel most comfortable with it.

Do you use runes?
I'd like to learn.

Do you use a pendulum?
Just started to.

Do you use dowsing rods?
No.

Do you use astrology?
Just started to really understand it.

Any other form of divination?
I read tea leaves

Spells

What was the first spell you did?
protection

What was the latest?
Inner Peace.

Ever done a love spell?
Nope.  I don't believe in them.

A job spell?
Not really.

A healing spell?
yes

What was the most powerful spell you've ever performed?
Protection.

Cryptozoology

Do you believe in Vampires?
If only Eric Northman from True Blood were real!  I believe in entities that can suck the life from you, but Dracula and the rest of the fanged ones are sadly not real.

Werewolves?
No.

Shape shifters?
In the spiritual world.

Elves? Faeries? Dragons? Nymphs? Sprites? Mermaids? Sirens? Satyrs?
Yup.

Angels?
Sort of.  Not in the Christian/Catholic sense.

Ghosts/Spirits?
Yes.

Ever "seen" any of the above?
Only my grandparents.

Ever talked to any of the above?
See above.

Ever called on any of the above in magic?
I wouldn't say call upon them.  I've talked to them and asked for guidance, but never in formal spell or ritual.

Do you have one of them as a personal guardian?
Both of them.  I wouldn't know what to do if they didn't show up when I needed them most.

Random

Do you see a rabbit, a man or a woman in the moon?
An old woman.

Own a cat?
I own two and live with a third (it's my Mother's cat).

When you meditate what does your sacred/safe place look like?
Under the willow tree in a clearing of the woods.

Do you work with Chakras?
Eventually.

Do you believe in soul mates?
Yup.

Ever met one?
Yup.  <3 the hubby.

Do you have a Spirit guide?
I think so.

Is it always love and light?
Like I said earlier, you cannot have dark without light.  It's all shades of grey anyway.

Quickening Moon Ritual

 

View of the Quickening Moon from Between the Trees at my Home

The Quickening Moon

The Quickening Moon is also known as the Snow Moon or the Bone Moon to the Cherokee.  It is considered the last moon of winter and is when the "quickening" can be felt in the pregnant animals whose babies are due in springtime.  It is a time when the Earth herself is reminding us that she is still alive underneath all of that snow.

Full Moons are sometimes a time for magic or for reflection.  For this Quickening Moon, I will be reflecting on my own mistakes and on how I'd like to improve myself.  Even though Imbolc has past, I still feel that its intentions are still in the air on this last night of February.  Imbolc is about cleansing the soul and meditating under the Quickening Moon is an excellent way to do that.  So, if you can find a window where the Moon can gaze down upon you or if you are brave enough to withstand the elements, light a candle (I always use white) and think about what you want to improve about yourself or in your life.  Concentrate on what you must do to make these changes possible.  You can even say this chant to yourself: 

I rejoice in the light of the moon

and in the presence of the Lord and the Lady.

I celebrate the season of darkness,
knowing that the next turn of the Wheel will bring light.
I use this time of darkness for thought,
introspection, and growth. 
As the moon above, so the earth below.*

*adapted from Winter Full Moon Ritual

After this you may wish to go into a formal ceremony or have a meal with loved ones and share in the warmth that they bring to the home.  This can be a reminder of the warmer weather that is on the way.  Decorate the table with signs of spring or just have a simple bouquet of spring flowers as your centerpiece (they can be real or silk).  Remember to give thanks (verbally or internally) for those who can share the meal with you and for the meal itself.

Quickening Moon Meeting

The Gods always know.  I was driving to the Full Moon Circle meeting just a little while ago.  I reached into my purse to grab my wallet and make sure I had enough money for the altar supply donation.  My wallet was missing.  I looked at my phone and sure enough, there was a message from my friend whose house I was at last night telling me she had my wallet.  I guess the Gods knew today was not a good idea and knew how to keep me home.

I should learn to trust my nerves more often.

"Where will I find that wishing stone?"

I guess all of those late night talks with the Lord and Lady about having a white winter were a bit much.  The hubby and my Dad are out shoveling the white stuff.  I'm stuck inside with a sour stomach.

This weekend I'm (hopefully) meeting with a group to celebrate the new full moon.  I'm a bit nervous as I've never met anyone in this group in person.  I took some advice and used meetup.com.  They all seem nice from reading their e-mails and message board posts, but I'm unsure.  I've never spoken with anyone in person about my beliefs besides my two friends.  I'm nervous about them being all about showy rituals rather than actual worship.  You hear stories about covens which is why I've played the part of a solitary.  But I've grown tired of being alone.  Although my husband is supportive of my beliefs, he does not wish to join me in them.  I do have my two friends, but one of them lives rather far away and the other is dealing with her own personal problems, so it makes it hard to get together without her worrying about 70,000 other things.

How should I approach this?  I plan on mainly observing when I'm with the group on Sunday.  I just hope all goes well and I'm not weirded out by them.  I wish I could stop being so nervous.

A new beginning

After doing much research on my maternal family, I was stuck in a limbo.  I was in college, a Catholic college at that, and I just never felt attached to anything.  I was depressed.  I felt like there was still a void in my life that no amount of drinking, partying, or other "extra curricular activities" could fill.  Of course, being an ignorant 20 something, I did nothing about this other than the above mentioned.  I graduated.  I found my first teaching job.  I met my husband.  I went through the motions of everything I was "supposed" to.  I hit a figurative wall: I couldn't sleep, I would panic over everything, and I could barely leave the house to go to work.  The constant burial of my anger and spiritual loneliness finally caught up with me.  I went on anti-depressants and sought therapy.  It's been a slow process, but I'm getting better.

So, how did any of this lead me to the path?  This past summer, I ordered 3 books on a whim from Amazon dot com: Scott Cunningham's Guide for the Solitary Practitioner , The Complete Idiots Guide to Wicca and Witchcraft (an excellent book, believe it or not), and Buckland's Complete Book of Witchcraft.  I was bored online and was searching through the recommendations and all three had come up (probably because of my purchases on Native American religions, but who knows?).  So, I ordered them.  And then I read.  Like a maniac.  Something finally clicked.  Everything that I had been taught by family was in these books.  All the morals I believed in, even the little herbal "tricks" my grandmother would use when we were sick, were in these books.  I was stunned.

I finally felt comfortable enough to approach the subject with two close friends who were Wiccan.  I asked them questions and I was given honest answers.  Talking about the emptiness I'd been feeling for so long felt so wonderful.  These were things I never thought anyone could understand, not even my therapist.  I felt better.  The missing puzzle pieces were right in front of me for years, but I'd ignored them.  I'd come home.